Feeling A Moment
by Muzzy-Olorea
Summary: [HCu] Set after [S3 ‘Words and Deeds’] She knew she was having one of those rare moments with House which made all the crap he put her through worth it.


**Feeling A Moment**

**HC Set after S3 'Words and Deeds' ****She knew she was having one of those rare moments with House which made all the crap he put her through worth it. **

_**Disclaimer: The plot's mine. Just borrowing the characters though and will return them intact once I'm done.**_

**A/N:- I'm new to this fandom and slowly making my way through the episodes. I think anything I write in which House isn't a complete ass must mean I've written him out of character but here we go, I've tried my best …….. **

**'Feeling A Moment' - Feeder**

Her first thought was to ignore whoever it was who was knocking on the door - after all anyone stupid enough to expect anyone to still be awake at this time of the night deserved to be ignored, but after five minutes of incessant banging and aware that if the noise was loud enough to wake her, it was probably loud enough to wake her neighbours, Cuddy reluctantly crawled out of bed and wrapped a blanket round her shoulders before shuffling towards the front door. She honestly wasn't surprised to see who it was and she briefly thought about just going back to bed and leaving him there but almost as if he had read her thoughts, the banging got louder.

She unbolted the door and tugged it open. "It's 3am House."

"I know." He said almost happily. "You look good. You should try that look at work." He said pushing past whilst glancing at her shorts and ratty T-shirt combined with the bedhead.

Having known the man for so long it surprised her that his arrogance and lack of consideration for anyone except himself still managed to shock her. "Wilson told me about the Vicodin you were still taking in rehab so if you've come to apologise for that then …."

"I haven't." House said, tossing his rucksack onto the sofa. "Got some juice? Still haven't got my bike back so had to take the night bus over here and there was this geriatric club-goer that insisted on coughing all over me and I think I can feel something itching at the back of my throat ……" He didn't wait for an answer but instead limped down the corridor and into the kitchen. He returned a few minutes later with a full carton of orange juice and started drinking it straight from the carton, his eyes sparkling with amusement at the look of disgust on his boss' face.

"It's 3am." She repeated, her brain still shutdown in denial. She needed a lot of caffeine to deal with House and his cutting-edge comments and now she was running on an empty tank.

He threw himself down on the couch and rested his feet on the coffee table knowing how much she hated that. "I'm sorry, were you asleep?" He replied with such a I-couldn't-careless tone to his voice that all she could do was glare and reluctantly sit down with him.

"I can't believe all that time in rehab when we thought you were getting better, you were still taking Vicodin. I mean god House you knew if anyone found out you would be going straight to jail and yet you act like you're superior to all those other people in rehab and are too 'good' to go through the pain of detox like the rest of them and …"

"Spare me the speech. It's like 3am in the morning. It's _far_ too late for class to still be going on."

Cuddy sighed and tucked her feet underneath her on the sofa. "Why are you here House?" She asked tiredly.

House didn't say anything for awhile as if he was asking himself the same question. He took his feet off the table and leant forward resting his elbows on his knees and rubbing his hands together. "I owe you an apology."

"HA -!"

"No." House interrupted. "I'm not apologising for what I did in rehab or for refusing to treat patients because you didn't give me pills, not even for what I put Wilson and the others through and certainly not for anything I said or did to Tritter himself but because I crossed the line with what I said to you." He paused. "I shouldn't have said that you would be a bad mother and I was out of line using your inability to have children as an insult. I'm sorry." He said, making eye contact for a second before staring down at his hands.

Cuddy stared at him, speechless. She had definitely not seen that coming. And even though she knew he was a brilliant actor with an ability to reel off lies like the truth, this time he actually looked sincere as he apologised. "Guess some good did come out of rehab after all." She said with a light laugh.

House frowned slightly. "This isn't following some moronic 'save your life in ten steps, step three: apologise for all your wrongdoings' code. This is coming from me." The corners of Cuddy's mouth twitched slightly and as if he had realised he was coming dangerously close to showing he had a conscience, he added "And only an idiot would have risked their entire life and career lying under oath just to protect a manipulative stubborn-ass jerk."

"You missed out the bastard part."

House leant back in his seat. "And don't think you're fooling me with this whole self-sacrificing 'I did it for the good of the patients' act either. We both know the real reason why you did what you did: you couldn't have lived with the guilt if you'd let them put me in jail."

"Try me." She smirked. House chuckled.

She smile faded and she took a deep breath. "The first two implants didn't take and I lost the third one a few days before this whole Tritter-thing happened."

"You didn't say anything."

"Maybe some things just aren't meant to happen."

"Come on! You don't believe that crap and you know it. You're the hospital administrator and dean of medicine for god's sake. You know what you want and you go out and get it, usually for the sake of your beloved patients but the one thing you really want for yourself you can't have. Don't tell me that doesn't piss you off."

Cuddy shrugged. "Maybe this is just nature's way of telling me that I wouldn't make a good mother. You should have seen how awkward and distant I was with that scared little girl. Some people are just born with a maternal instinct and I guess some people like me just aren't. You were right with what you said."

"Oh please." House scoffed. "Aren't you the one who's always trying to tell me that I'm not always right?! People born with less maternal instinct than you become mothers and besides it's like sex – no matter how much you practice, you're either going to be fantastic at it or you're going to suck. Now we know you don't suck at sex so there's no reason to believe you're going to suck at dealing with the consequences of sex." He used the end of his cane to hook under the strap of his rucksack and pulled it towards him, tugging something out of it before tossing it over to Cuddy.

"You bought me a doll?!"

"It cries, poops, needs feeding and burping, slapping, shaking and whatever else a baby needs. You keep that alive a week, you can keep anything that pops out of your uterus alive." House said, popping some pills. "And I didn't buy it. Stole it out of the maternity ward." He added as an afterthought.

Cuddy smiled. She knew she was having one of those rare moments with House which made all the crap he put her through worth it. "So your diagnosis is I should keep trying fertility treatment and meanwhile practise with a doll?"

House shrugged. "Pretty much."

Cuddy looked at him. "Thanks House." And they both knew she wasn't thanking him for the doll or even for the apology but for helping keep her hope and faith alive.

He held her gaze and smiled. It was odd and unfathomable even to himself but as independent and hard-assed as he was, he knew that Cuddy was one person in this world that he would even come close to admitting he needed. "I'm guessing this is where we, if I were a normal person, would hug and declare our undying love for each other."

Cuddy laughed. "I own your ass House."

He rolled his eyes and reluctantly held his arms open. She embraced him and clung on tightly knowing how uncomfortable it would make him feel.

House patted her back awkwardly.

"You know if all else fails we could just have sex and continue having sex until you get pregnant and then you could give me the money you would normally have given to the sperm bank."

"So you'd be like …… a hooker?"

"Yep except I'd be giving you _so_ much more than just a good time."

"Hmmm. Well then I guess you would be the best $2 I ever spend."

**A/N:- There's one thing I love more than cookies and that's reviews. :)**


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